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November 23, 2005

So, I guess I never really did tell everyone where I was going for break… I have a bad habit of doing that.  I’m in San Diego visiting Angelica at UCSD.  Sorry!  I did want to stay and hang out with all of my friends, old and new, but you have to remember that she was in Japan for well over a year, during which time I didn’t get to see her at all, and I’ve only seen her once for maybe a week or two since she came back.  And also remember that from when I was born until the day she went to college, she was the dominant influence in my life.  Still is, in some ways.

We drove down here on Saturday, nice nine-hour road trip.  I intended to have most of Hamlet read by the time I got there.  Of course, that didn’t work out, but I have made it to Act III now.  Better than you guys are doing, right?  Even got a jump start on my soliloquy, just because I so enjoy that kind of thing.  I’ve got just about all the bits and pieces, just need to be able to string them together in one go.  I’m doing the 25-pointer, of course.  But yeah, I mostly wound up just listening to music on the way up–Weird Al, Guster, Beatles, Elvis Costello, XTC, to name a few.  I find myself liking Guster more every time I listen to them.  Maybe I’m just getting old.  And speaking of Weird Al, I was going to do one of his songs for Karaoke Thursday a week before break, and then they had a band come instead.  Lame… please remind me to bring my Even Worse album again the next time they plan one, since I rarely listen to the announcements.

Angelica still has class Monday through Wednesday, but we’ve found things to do on our own.  We typically go to bed around 11 to 11:30 and wake up around 9, and we’re out the door by 11.  Today we took a tour of the campus, which we did before for Angelica, but since I don’t remember much about it, we figured I might as well hear all the information again, especially since the application requires you to rank the colleges in order of preference and I really don’t know which one would be good for me.  The problem is all these vague philosophies.  For example, Thurgood Marshall College: “The best education includes an understanding of your role in society, regardless of major.”  I mean, who doesn’t believe that?  Isn’t that, like, the whole point of education in the first place?  Finding a role in society?  Anyway, I’m probably choosing Marshall first because the requirements look like something I’m interested in, and it’s apparently an unpopular choice so that I’m guaranteed a nice dorm.  Plus, their cafeteria’s pretty awesome.  But there’s also Revelle, which I think would suit me well because it has a very well-rounded curriculum.  In other words, you don’t really have to commit to anything, which is perfect for me.  To borrow some words from Rudyard Kipling, all areas of study count for me, but none too much.

My mom says that’s how all teenagers are, and I guess that’s probably true, but I do have a number of friends who seem to know more or less what they want to do.  I have seriously considered majors in every area for various reasons.  I was saying journalism for a while, but that was mostly just so I had something to say.  It’s like red being my favorite color.  I think favorite colors are kind of stupid.  No one color is better than any other color–you need them all, and in different contexts.  I like red cars, but as Kavita would tell me, red isn’t the way to go for someone going to Cal.  So I like the idea of being a journalist, but honestly?  It’s far from the perfect job for me.  I do like the idea of meeting new people and learning about new things all the time, and I love to write, but I’m not sure how good I would be at it.  I’m not really assertive enough to get the information I need, and, more importantly, I don’t notice things.  For example, I just learned that my mom told me that dinner was ready half an hour ago and several times after that, but I didn’t notice.  (Incidentally, I think most problems can be overcome if you focus hard enough on them, and therefore a short attention span is one of the most difficult problems to overcome.)  And if I’m not attentive to know when I get to eat food–FOOD, I tell you–I’m certainly not going to notice the important things to cover in a story.  And finally, writing articles leaves no room whatsoever for creative writing, which is what I really enjoy doing, hence the Xanga.  Thing is, I’m not creative enough to be a good fiction writer.

So then, there was history.  My favorite author, Orson Scott Card, said in an interview that an aspiring writer should major in history because, bottom line is, you have to find your own writing style on your own, and no amount of taking courses in writing will make a style up for you.  History, on the other hand, will expose you to a multitude of information about the way the world works and all of the major people who have ever interacted within it.  It gives you a background that provides you with material to base your own ideas around.  Sounds pretty good.  Except that I find history more difficult than any other subject, and it seems a waste not to put my real talents to good use.

There’s French, which, as of my score of 800 on the Subject test, appears to be my area of greatest expertise.  And Angelica is majoring in foreign languages as well, so I have footsteps to walk in.  But then, at some point, I would probably have to study abroad, or even live in some other country to maximize its usefulness.  I really don’t know if I could do what my sister is doing.  I mean, I like living in America.  I don’t want to have to start all over, which is what moving away would feel like to me.  And the same kind of goes for learning new languages.  I liked learning French because learning a language was a new experience.  Now, I would rather perfect my French than learn another one because learning another one would make me feel like I was just doing all of the same things all over again.

And math would probably be my second best subject, but really, have you looked at all those careers on Chayo’s walls?  “Agronomist” and “seismologist” somehow don’t appeal to me that much.  I can’t imagine having any kind of career that mostly involves math.  As much as I enjoy it as a class, I don’t want to ruin my relationship with the subject by trying to take it further.

Science is also an excellent choice, mainly because I like learning, and being a scientist is basically getting paid to learn.  There’s the math element in it without the stigma of boring career paths (though I guess the ones I mentioned above are actually sciences.  So sue me).  Plus, honors physics is pretty much the easiest extra-grade-point class I’ve ever had, despite what others may tell you about it.  And, I’d get to blow up stuff.

So that’s why I don’t have a favorite subject, just like I don’t have a favorite much of anything.  I say things are my favorite sometimes, but they rarely are.  And what it comes down to is that I can’t stand the thought of having the same career for the rest of my life.  There’s so much to do, so much to see, that how can anyone expect me to stick with one thing I’m interested in?  Switching jobs is an unstable thing to do financially, of course, but hey, if my work ethic has served me so well thus far, I’d like to think I can count on it in the future.  Or, if all else fails, I’ll just marry rich.

That’s the plan, and I’m stickin’ to it.  Or maybe not.  I’ll see what happens.


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  1. Wobbles you crack me up… you’re not even decisive about your indecisiveness! Seriously, though–pick a favorite. It’s what everybody else is doing! I’m sorry you’re not up here man. I really wish we’d get to hang sometime in the next couple months…

  2. Anonymous permalink

    ROAD TRIP!!!  : )  Well, I hope you’re having a great time with your sister down at UCSD.  Make sure you take lots and lots of pictures.  Please just try and relax while you’re down there, and don’t think about applications or majors.  Just think about the scenery, the people, anything!  When you get back to Folsom, then you can worry…and tell me how you ranked your colleges at SD.  : )

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