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December 16, 2005

I don’t know what my problem is.  It’s not like finding Yousef was really that difficult a task.  Not in this day and age.  But it’s one of those things where if I’m not really sure what I should do, I start obsessing about it and asking a bunch of people what to do, except that gets me nowhere, and I still have other stuff to do, so then I take my mind off the task at hand for a while and focus on something else until the situation is more urgent, and then I try a few more things and still get nowhere, and the pattern repeats until it’s too late to do anything else about it.  If I just tried EVERYTHING at the very beginning instead of separating it with periods of doing other things, I could have found him.  I could have.  Did I think this just wasn’t that important?  That we were going to be able to improv our entire debate just from looking over some sketchy debate notes that I wound up writing myself last night?  I absolutely HATE not being able to explain my failures away, because then it means I actually failed.  This was my fault.  I need to learn to figure out how to look for things by myself and not depend on other people to give me all the answers.  That’s why I haven’t been looking for scholarships, that’s why I still have made practically no headway on my senior project.  What good does it do me to be emotionally independent when I’m totally incompetent on my own?

And, I’m obsessing… again.

Finals week sucked.  I haven’t been sick in almost a year, and this week I got a bit feverish and congested.  I guess I should be thankful I didn’t have to stay home from school the first two days of the week like Jason did.  Actually, half the student body got sick this week, it seemed.  But still, first time in almost a year, and right in the middle of finals week.  Go figure.  There are some nice things about being sick, though.  I got 11 hours of sleep Wednesday night, and I can’t even remember how long it’s been since I got that good a night’s sleep.  But then the next day I felt considerably better, so it naturally followed that I couldn’t fall asleep for over two hours.

But it all worked out in the end.  My head was quite clear for the two finals that mattered, English and calculus, and I’m quite pleased with my performance on both.  Somehow squeezed out an A on the impossible Hamlet final and wound up with the highest semester grade in English with a 93–now that’s one tough class.  And I fell only 6 million points short of an A on the overall final in calculus.  So I should still be eligible as a valedictorian.  I’m just glad it’s over.  One semester to go…

Backtracking now… on Sunday I went to this anime convention in Sacramento with Jason and his friends from Anime Club.  We all went in costume, in true nerd fashion.  Jason was an original character: the Bathroom Ninja.  He had a ninja-style headband just under a shower cap and a bathrobe with a wooden sword on one side and a rolled up newspaper on the other.  I dug up some of the stuff from when I was Ryu from Street Fighter for Halloween, except most of it didn’t fit anymore, so I made a couple of minor changes.  The girls who came with us had much more elaborate costumes, but I didn’t know who they were supposed to be.  I think they were from Final Fantasy.  Three of them entered the costume contest they had there, two of them as one group.  Both the group of two and the single won honorable mentions, and Phyllis, who was in the group of two, also won second place in the art contest for the under-18 age group.  I think she was the only there who won prizes in both contests.  There were also some video game contests going on, an anime viewing room, and a whole mess of anime merchandise.  So that was a pretty fun time.  It also probably had something to do with Jason’s subsequent sickness, and perhaps my later one as well.  Got cocky, I guess.

Only three days until I leave for Hawaii!


From → Uncategorized

  1. Sorry I didn’t return your call.

  2. whoa whoa, and happy birthday.

  3. An amime convention? I’m dissapointed. What would T. think? would you still be his hero?

  4. is final fantasy even anime? dude rachael had asked me to give you yousef’s information, but i don’t really know him well and i don’t know that might have been awkward. do you have a myspace? because i’m pretty sure that would have been an easy way to communicate with almost anyone. sorry this is probably dumb to tell you this now and sorry i didn’t help before. i hope your vacation has been superb

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